First of all, an apology. For all you Scots who are sick of hearing England songs, or for that matter, just about anybody who can't stand to hear grown men chanting about football - I'm sorry, writes Rags Martel.
You see, for the last few weeks I've been More4's self appointed "World Cup song" correspondent. It's not the most prestigious title in journalism. While my colleagues here at More4 News have been unearthing exclusives about atrocities in Darfur and mafia wars in Italy, I've been investigating a much more serious phenomenon: who is singing what for England.
I know there are many who think one football tune is one too many, but traditionally there aren't that many around. (Usually, there's an official song chosen by the Football Association and one or two, slightly less cheesy and perhaps more annoying, unofficial ones). But this year, there are, well, scores more.
In the spirit of embracing Germany 2006, we decided to ask viewers for their original compositions. The response was stronger than a John Terry tackle. At one point we were receiving five songs an hour.
I knew World Cup fever had got out of control when my boss suggested Channel 4 News presenters should do a song. "Do you really want to be in the same league as Neil and Christine Hamilton or Showaddywaddy?" I replied. The reputation of a respected news organisation was at stake. Bravely, I showed the gaffer a yellow card.
With the tournament now under way, I've hung up my boots. I am no longer World Cup song correspondent. Well, not for another four years at least.
Here's how More4 viewers voted in our World Cup song poll. Watch the top three here.
1. Hi Ho Come On England by Blind Granny's Taxi Nightmare.
2. Handbags by Angry Kid.
3. Keep It going England by Mike Grant
4. England Are Jolly Dee by Neil and Christine Hamilton
5. Hi Ho Come On England by John Leyton
6. I Am An England Fan by Sweet FA
7. Hurry Up England by Sham 69
8. Sing It For England by Young Stanley
9. Pride Of Lions by The Metatarsals
10. Gaffer Told Me by Dean Faithful
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